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Do you often find the tips that people give for betterwell-being

Well-being, sounds impossible to fit around your life?

Do you often feel it will cause more stress than it’s worth? That is the last thing you need, right?

The reason for this, is that you have unique life, with your unique needs and challenges. So to take the time to work out what YOU need to create YOUR well-being is the best way to ensure you gain a happier emotional state as opposed to increasing stress. People’s well meaning advice and tips can only come from their own personal experience – what causes peace in one person can cause overwhelming anxiety in another.

So What Is Well-Being?

This is a question that has been discussed since Aristotle’s day as it has always been recognised as the fundamental essence to our existence as humans. Well-being is a combination of

~ Good internal feelings

~ Vitality

~ Resilience to cope with the challenges of life

~ Having meaning and purpose to your existence

~ Feeling competent in the activities undertaken

So if we realise the importance of well-being, why are more and more people reporting feelings of dissatisfaction and rising stress levels?

What are the 3 key mistakes that sabotage the pursuit of happiness and well-being?

1)Believing well-being will be gained by an external factor.

How many people do you know that believe they will be finally happy once they have met their soulmate; bought that special dress; have a certain amount of money in their bank account? Have you noticed they never quite reach that sense of satisfaction? That’s because Well-being is very much an inside-out phenomena. This means that to achieve true well-being, you have to gain it inside of yourself as opposed to expecting someone or a material item to give it to you. Connecting your feeling of well-being on your appearance, a relationship, the amount of money in the bank or the size of your house will always leave you feeling disappointed and looking for the next thing to bring that feeling in. Of course all these things help to create a happier life – a dysfunctional relationship as opposed to a happy relationship, will have a big impact on your sense of well-being. Having a comfortable home over squalor. A major a part of creating well-being in your life is recognising and changing what is adding to the unwanted feelings. However, to believe that your sense of happiness is reliant on another is not a reliable strategy. And no one can live up to that expectation – resulting in reduced well-being. Create a good relationship with yourself and material items. Get the formula balanced and well-being will be closer!

2) Following someone else’s Well-Being plan

It took me years to fully realise that the tips I was following for a better life were causing me more harm than good. With every activity I tried..and failed at..my confidence reduced. My resilience was being affected and I felt incompetent. I tried Yoga classes at 5am- (I ended up feeling exhausted). Living on raw foods (I felt constantly hungry and empty). Aerobics (I am one of those people that goes right when everyone else is going left) Stopped drinking alcohol (hmmmm..didn’t last long!). All these failed attempts were ideas from other people..and were completely wrong for me and my life. But, when I looked at the criteria required for Well-being, I was then able to work out how to fulfill what I need to be content.

A vital part of my plan is exercise – running at least 2 times a week – more if possible. As a mum of 3 the best time for me is 6.30am. That suits me..for someone else that is hell – so I wonder what exercise regime works for you? Your exercise of choice? The right time? How much? Getting this right can really make the difference. What do you need to include in your life to reconnect to your wellbeing?

Consequently, I feel this to be so instrumental to happiness, my workshop Mindfulness and Well-being for Busy Mums, has a whole section on this subject. My attendees will work out, with my guidance, what each of their criteria is to create the perfect plan for them.

3) Ignoring emotional upset from your past

During your life path, you can experience many challenges – many you can move from easily; others can stick and keep hold to us emotionally. This can create feelings of frustration, knock down your confidence and in big responses create anxiety, stress and anger. There has been a lot of coverage recently with Prince Harry about how he suppressed the pain of the death of his mother. He said that seeing a counsellor has changed his life. If you are struggling, the journey to understanding what you are going through and gaining some peace can be a life opening and transforming. The best path to Well-being and contentment is to understand who you are and release the hold past demons might still have. Then your relationship with yourself and those that you share your life with will naturally shift.

Understanding what Well-being means to you and what you need to  incorporate into your life can revolutionise how you live your life. And during those wobbly times – and let’s face it, we all have them – it means you can take a look at a good starting point to get yourself back on track. Mine is to call my running friends to get me back out running. What’s your starting point?

If you can see the benefit to working out your own personal Well-Being plan, then come and join me and other like-minded women and create yours. Spaces are limited and filling up. So book today to avoid disappointment

 

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