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When thinking about the term midlife crisis, an image of an aging man driving a convertible sports car and having an affair with a twenty something colleague pops to mind. However, the women’s midlife crisis is just as prevalent but shows itself in a very different way. Whilst the male midlife crisis is usually about the feeling of lost youth, women often report a feeling of a lack of fulfillment, a shaking of their confidence and a need to reassess their lives.

The female midlife crisis can be shown as the career woman realising that she is never going to get to the position she had dedicated her life to and recognises the hard work she has put in her working life is not going to achieve the results she had believed would be accomplished. Possibly she has reached the position but is questioning whether the hard work and sacrifice has been worth it. Or it could look like the woman who has put her career to one side to raise her children. And now that they are at school, she asks herself what now? She’s dedicated her life to others but feels she has achieved nothing for herself.

Often experienced between the ages of 35-55, the crisis can be all consuming, with the under current affecting all aspects of the woman’s life. Whilst you might think of it as a time of affairs and Botox the reality is often very different.

So how do you know this is what can you are experiencing?

Women going through the midlife crisis can report some or all of the following symptoms:
~A feeling of worthlessnessfemale-midlife-crisis
~A reduction in confidence and/or self esteem
~Unfulfillment and boredom
~Depression and/or anxiety
~Loneliness
~Drinking too much alcohol
~A lack of focus and meaning in your life
~A void deep within you that cannot be filled.

Some or all of the above can be triggered by a number of possible reasons. Some reasons include divorce, an empty nest, death of a parent, a birthday (especially with a 9 or 1 in it!), redundancy or nothing in particular that you can put your finger on. Just the awareness of the passing of time can be enough to trigger the crisis.

If tackled in the right way, the midlife crisis can turn into one of the most important and transforming times of your life. Many of the choices that we make in our twenties are made out of idealism, living up to the expectations of (or rebelling against) our parents and society.

Just as though it is your soul crying out to be heard, if you give yourself the time to work out what it is that your soul is telling you and then taking the appropriate steps, it can mean you can transform the second part of your life journey to be one of fulfillment and more happiness. Of course, there are many aspects of our lives that we are unable to control. And embracing this awareness can be a big part of the transformation. However, there are many things that we can control.

During a period of crisis, it is your opportunity to work out what you want out of life and to put those ideas into action. As Carl Jung suggested, it is a time to reevaluate your earlier values. Start working out what your values are now, and how they can be fulfilled and satisfied within the next stage of your life. With the help of a good friend or coach, you can turn what feels to be the worst time of your life into the single most wonderful and transformative period of your life.

If you would like to ensure the second part of your life is fulfilling and happy, contact me on

07847 386562 or info@gisellemonbiot.com.

 

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